November 13th, 2018, I underwent a major surgery that had me out for almost two months from work and nearly locked in the house the entire time unable to leave. It was an excruciating and uncomfortable season. During this time, I began writing a book.
I returned to work in mid-January of 2019. To my surprise, the environment and conditions upon return were not so pleasant. It left me dumbfounded at how I was being treated after two months of being gone. I was sure that I hadn't upset anyone because I wasn't there. However, if I did somehow upset or do something wrong to someone, why couldn't we talk about it. I sought God on answers, and He kept reminding me of 1 Peter 2:18. Paraphrased, "When mistreated by a superior, we should submit by entrusting ourselves to God. Of course, that is a lot easier said than done. I had all kinds of thoughts running through my head, and to say the least, they were not pleasant. The hardest part was not to allow my actions to reflect what was in my heart. I wanted answers, not from man, but from God. Why was He letting me go through this for no apparent reason? So, if I were to submit to this, then I needed God to change my heart and perspective because no way I could do this on my own. I continued to seek God, and He began a journey of doing even more of an excellent work in me and reassuring me of what He called me to do. When things like this happen, it can be easy to question whether we did something wrong. But that's not always the case. God reminded me of Joseph of the bible, who did nothing wrong and was falsely accused of an act and thrown in prison for years. Joseph endured a season of life because God knew it would position him to fulfill the dream he had many years before. He did not know this would lead to that moment, but God knew. We don't always understand why we are going through something, but God always knows.
The events I encountered on my job caused me to be very uncomfortable with being comfortable and eventually lead me to leave my job and pursue the things God put in my heart. While the outward conditions were very unpleasant, the inward condition of my heart caused me to cry out to God. During that time, God was working things through my life that positioned me to write many chapters of my book because of the revelation I received and the willingness to apply it. I spent many late nights and early mornings weeping as I cried out to God, and He poured into me, and I poured out on paper. I grew in my walk with God, I grew closer to the Holy Spirit, and I grew in my way of thinking. That season changed me and allowed me to walk in obedience to my purpose. God knew that if things didn't get uncomfortable, I would have stayed at a job instead of pursuing the work He prepared for me.
I’m thankful for this season because it produced something amazing in me that had I not gone through those experiences I’m not sure I would be where I am today.
You may be going through a similar situation with a job, family member, or merely walking through a season of uncertainty. It may be painful, ugly, and very uncomfortable but hang in there; God is producing something in you by applying pressure to take you to the next level.